There are times when we look back to bygone days and events. In looking back, we likely have times we are grateful for and times that we regret. In the best of circumstances, we learn as we live.
As I look back and think about those good times and times not so good, I understand that reflection is a key component of living a good life. When we give ourselves time to listen, prioritize, work hard, and then reflect, we build capacity for good living.
What is it that we want? What is it that we value? Who do we want to be? What do we have to do to live the life we imagine and reach for?
As I look back and think about areas of life, I think about relationships. Those that have remained strong have been trusting, forgiving, caring, and enjoyable relationships. Relationships built on foundations of lack of trust, too much judgement, little forgiveness, and no fun didn't last or develop well. Good relationships matter in life, and to nurture those relationships we have to be loving, trustworthy, thoughtful, and kind.
Sometimes we wander into areas where we naturally don't belong. We try out behaviors and places to see if we fit in only to find that's not a good place or behavior for us. That's how we learn about who we are and what makes us happy. There's no regrets for trying out places, people, and actions. The only regret in this regard is when we resist trying something new because of fear as when that happens we deny ourselves an opportunity that might be just-right for us.
Regrets about too much judgement, not enough listening, and a need for greater empathy and compassion, are regrets many people feel as they age because with age we naturally gain more empathy, humility, and care if we are directed toward living good lives. As we err, learn about life, and try out new people, places, and actions, we learn a lot about how incomplete we are as people. None of us have the monopoly on knowledge, good living, or doing the right thing--we're all a mix of success and challenge, that's what it means to be human.
To live each day well with a "little for today and a little for tomorrow" as my father always says is a good path to follow, and as my mother said day after day, also "enjoy the stage you're in" because you'll never go back there and every stage of life has its unique joys and opportunities. Further, don't play the compare game, because it's a game that no one ever wins. Life your life to the fullest for each of our paths is unique holding great promise. Onward.
